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Who Are You Exactly?

“And I, infinitesimal being, drunk with the great starry void, likeness, image of mystery, felt myself a pure part of the abyss,  I wheeled with the stars, and my heart broke loose on the wind.”

– Pablo Neruda

A few weeks ago, a client asked that question during a session. I’ve heard it so many times but this day it annoyed the snot out of me. It was no longer amusing or interesting or merely confounding. The idea became annoying because it was, to me, a symbol of all the things we don’t take at face value; how things aren’t enough for us as they appear. Right in front of us.

I know we categorize and compare on purpose.  The other day,  Seth Godin reminded me so. I’ve tried to tastefully do that when it comes to the work and to how I appear in the world. But I was thrown when asked the question again because it came on the tail of another person saying a second most-annoying, “I don’t think you really know who you are.” I also understand that in an effort to explain the inexplicable, the need to compare and categorize takes on a deeper meaning and may become a concrete definition of things. We humans have done that since our inception.

Those of us that are the outliers and disruptors, though, defy that method of understanding. We don’t fit archetypal views or existing cosmologies that lend themselves to convenient categorization. The more you try to shove us into that, the more we either rebel or you will walk away.

Many people believe I am the Jesus dude-Part Deux, others look at me and see Sioux; I show up in dreams as an Elephant, and here is who I am rightthisverynow, until tomorrow or the wind changes direction:

I am exactly how you see me and how you can’t see me. I am the voice you can’t hear when you pray. I am the being whose essence is the beacon for Beloveds. I am a force of nature with a  healing capacity fueled by those who walked millennia before me I am the presence that has never left you when you’ve felt most alone. I am the hearted-body of ancients and elements. I need no other name. I am. I am real. I am we. We are many. We are infinite. Made of mud and stardust, we have been drummed into the world by a collective heart. We are those from whom you’ve separated. When our feet touch the ground, our heart-hand touches others. We were before. We are now. We are here. Again. We live and breathe and move as one.

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